Posts Tagged ‘Change’

Hello, my loyal followers! So, I know it’s been 2 weeks again since I posted, and I’m really sorry about that. The thing is, even if it still hasn’t been that long since the start of the new semester, things have gotten pretty crazy. I’m talking homework crazy. So, yeah. That’s the reason why I haven’t been able to post in so long. But, luckily, I have some free time right now, and I’m actually waiting for an archery match to start. So, since it’s been 2 weeks, I’ll have to tell you about all that happened since I last posted, and man, have things been happening (you can probably tell from the title). Although, this time, I really am going to try and keep this post as short as possible. I’ll eventually have to come up with some kind of posting schedule, but I won’t worry about that right now. Right now, I’ll tell you of all my interesting happenings.

So, the Monday before this past one, I went to our local nursing home with my GS Crew. Depending on certain circumstances, it can be enjoyable. Although, it can sometimes be sad. This trip was more enjoyable than some, and I actually saw an old teacher of mine who retired there. He wasn’t in the nursing home, he was visiting a relative. So, that was cool.

As far as archery goes that week, I actually don’t remember much, except for the fact that my archery buddy and I are totally awesome at shooting balloons.

Oh, I almost forgot about that Tuesday. That day, for me, was happy, yet, also, a little sad. It was the last day of the semester, and, as soon as the new one started, I knew lots of things would change. The thing I was most sad about was the fact that I have a really good friend, that I’d only bonded with over this school year, that I did have both a class and lunch with that I wouldn’t have that class or lunch with them anymore. Seriously, though, just over the course of this year, we’ve gotten really close. I admit, I didn’t expect us to grow that close, but I am really glad it happened, because we always have a lot of fun when we’re together. That’s why it was so sad for me.

On Wednesday, we didn’t have school.

Oh, wait, I also forgot to tell you about how I did on my 1st period final. Okay, so, I kid you not when I say I stayed locked in my room the night before for about 3 hours studying all the material. I felt ready afterwards, but then, something unexpected happened the day of the final. I was late for school, and I was freaking out, thinking that I wouldn’t do very good. And, what’s worse, my dad and I got into a bit of a disagreement, and he actually said some pretty mean things (it was all worked out in the end, though). Anyway, I finally got to school, and went and took the final. I wouldn’t find out until the end of the day whether I’d passed or not. As soon as school let out, I went straight to the teacher’s room, and, as I hoped, I passed! All my studying payed off, and it felt great! It was awesome. Anyhow, I will now tell you about the first day of the new semester.

First off, I’ll just say that almost ALL my classes changed, except for two! The only classes that stayed the same for me were 1st and 7th period. The first day was a lot more dramatic than I would have liked it to be. I wasn’t really sure what I was worried about, but I was pretty stressed for some reason. The good news is, even though I was mostly worried about who I would sit with at lunch, I was able to get some new lunch buddies. I’m talking about my archery buddy’s cousin and one, sometimes two, of her friends, and we sit at the table right next to where my archery buddy sits with all her other friends. So, yeah, it didn’t turn out nearly as bad as I thought it would. In fact, it turned out pretty good. Also, on Thursday, I went back to softball practice for the first time in awhile. Me, my archery buddy, and my archery buddy’s cousin all went back, together, for the first time in awhile. Although, some things had changed. Our practices aren’t happening at school anymore, but in an old gym, and, also, we’re now lifting. Lifting, as in using these machines to work out different parts of our bodies. It was pretty cool, because, after I worked out my legs on one, my legs felt all jelly-like when I got off. Also, I guess I didn’t have much rust on me as I thought I would, because I was able to get right back into the swing of batting (no pun intended). So, it went really well.

Now, I don’t know how, but I’ve pretty much forgotten everything about Friday. Well, now, I can move on to this week!

This Monday, was awesome. I’ll just skip everything else and tell you what I did after school let out. My good friend, who I told you about, who I used to have lunch with, usually walks home after school, but, this time, she was getting picked up. So, I decided to surprise her. When I got outside, as soon as I saw her, and made sure she was stopped, I ran over to her as fast as I could! Man, was she shocked! But, she was happy to see me, too. And I mean really, REALLY excited to see me, even though we hadn’t been apart that long. It was awesome, and I think we both needed it, because we were both missing each other. Also, that day, our archery team had our first and only away match of the season. Yeah, it was weird, having a match on a Monday, but I enjoyed it. We had to travel a ways to get to the place. And, also, we would be shooting against one of the top teams in our state. What made it so interesting, though, was the fact that my dad and I had to give a couple of my teammates and their mom a ride there and back, which was very interesting. Let’s just say we took a lot of selfies. Not long after we got there, everyone else finally started showing up, but we were the first ones. So, how did I do? Let’s just say I could’ve done better. Although, it really wasn’t my fault, it was because, during rounds, the 1st flight stopped after the 10m round and let the 2nd flight shoot, which I think totally threw me off (it’s usually 10m, 15m, then 2nd flight). The funniest part of the whole trip didn’t happen until after it was all over. When it all ended, me and the majority of the rest of the team stopped and got food at a restaurant. And there, for the first time ever, I got drunk and hyper at the same time. I drank root beer, which made me drunk, and, as if that wasn’t bad enough, I ate ice cream with many sugary ingredients. So, as one of my teammates said, I was like a kindergartner who drank 10 energy drinks. That being, the ride back home was a lot of fun. I think everyone laughed a lot at the fact that I was hyper-drunk, or I guess I must’ve said some pretty crazy things in that state. Yeah, it was definitely crazy.

The next day, I brought that night up in conversation with my archery buddy’s cousin at lunch. Although, I guess I should’ve brought it up differently, because her friend who didn’t know what we were talking about took my words in a completely different way. I said to her, “So,  (name), last night was crazy, right? I could barely get up this morning!” So, yeah, she was just like, “WHAT DID YOU PEOPLE DO LAST NIGHT???”, and so the cousin explained it to her. Let me tell you, I was telling others about that for the rest of the day, especially at archery practice later that day. I got a wide variety of reactions. Anyway, at practice, I didn’t do that well again. But, I just shrugged it off this time. Little did I know, that I would start doing a lot better at practice yesterday (the schedule changed). I actually don’t remember much from Wednesday, so I’ll skip it.

Thursday, just yesterday, my score went up to higher than it had been. I felt really good about that, and so, now I hope it will continue for today’s match, because this match just so happens to be our State Qualifier. Yeah. And, we’re going against the very team we faced Monday, who, did I mention, beat us by over 100 points? So, the only thing I can do is have faith in my ability and use all the newly-honed skills I’ve picked up so far this season. Well, I think that’ll be all for now. Wish me luck for this match, and I’ll post again as soon as I can!

Come back for my next post!

Alright everyone, before anything else, I’d just like to wish you all a late Happy New Year, and I hope 2015 has been going well for you so far. Next, I’d like to apologize for my very long absence, but, the good news is, I’m back, and do I have things to tell you about! However, I am going to try to sum things up as much as I possibly can, so that this post isn’t really, really long. And, finally, about the title of this post, I don’t know what the future holds for this blog after I graduate. I might try to keep it running, but, things could change so much that I’d have to change the very title of this blog, or, perhaps, I could just start a new one. Feel free to leave your thoughts as to what you, my followers, think I should do concerning this blog. And now, on to the Friday Christmas Break started.

So, as you all know, Friday was the first match of the season for archery. As I was typing the last post that I posted on here that day, it ended up being so long that I had to keep typing it even when the match was going on after 6 at night. It was when I was sitting out, of course, since our team is always divided into 2 flights (1st flight shoots, then 2nd). So, for our first match, we didn’t go against another team, we went against our county’s sheriff’s department. So, yeah, we shot against cops. That’s not all, though. Since we didn’t have enough cops to have us all shoot against, it just so happens that 2 of our former senior teammates who graduated last year actually showed up with their bows and everything, so I actually got to shoot against one of them. It was great. In the end, we totally won, which was awesome, but my score was terrible. It was actually the worst score I’d gotten since practice started, and at a match of all things! That was what really upset me. But, it was okay. After the match was over, for those of us who didn’t leave right after it was over, we were all divided up into different groups playing with kickballs, volleyballs, and balls made out of tape. That was me. Me and 3 other of my teammates were throwing a ball made of tape, and I was throwing it like I would a softball in softball practice. Although, I guess I threw it harder than I usually do at actual softball practice, because, my archery buddy’s cousin, who’s in archery and softball like me, asked, “Archerpoet! Why can’t you throw like that in softball?” I just looked back at her, smiled, and said, “I can’t?” Then, when I was finally leaving, I stood in a spot where I could look over everyone, and thought, these are my people, and I wouldn’t want it any other way. So, yeah. It all ended well. After that, my Christmas Break officially started.

Well, I’m just going to say that, normally, Christmas Break would be really awesome, especially when it first starts off, but, this one, actually started off being pretty stressful for, not just me, but my whole family. As you should know from my previous posts, with my grandpa at home with the condition he’s in, it can be really hard on all of us. I actually think that that’s now the main reason why my dad and grandma get upset with each other, and there are times where it feels like I’m just caught in the middle of everything. I don’t know what to do sometimes. But, the good news is, we do have people who have been coming and helping him, so it’s less work for us. Other good news includes me being able to get along pretty well the aid that came almost every day (except for Christmas and New Year’s) to do stuff for my grandpa. It was only during December, though. Now she’s only coming 3 times a week, and I have school again during the week, so I never see her. I’ll admit, it has become more stressful again, but, most of the time, it’s not that bad. Though, there was a time when I felt so upset about it, I had to just go to my room, lock myself in, and cry my eyes out. That’s something I hadn’t done often at all, until my grandpa came home. Now, I am glad that we can have him home, but, if his condition starts getting any worse than it is, we’ll eventually have to send him to a nursing home, and my dad and I are actually the ones who’ve thought that would be best from the start. My grandma always has mixed feelings about it, which I understand a little, since he’s her husband and all, but, one of these days, something’s going to have to happen. But, enough about such a depressing topic. Christmas Break did get better, with the aid coming over to help. We finally had Christmas, and I got everything I wanted, including a new phone. A smartphone, not a flip phone from the dinosaur age. That was the best thing, because, if I didn’t tell you before, my arc hey buddy’s cousin had been hounding me because of how outdated my phone was, so I couldn’t wait to whip it out and tell her that she can’t hound me anymore! I also got a lot of stuff to watch, which kept me locked in my room over most of Christmas Break. It was great! Although, the most awesome thing I did before Break ended didn’t happen until almost right before it was time to go back to school.

On Saturday, January 3rd, 2015, I had the greatest night of my life. It was with my GS Crew, and it was the most amazing thing that ever happened to me. I won’t say exactly what it was, since I don’t want to give away my exact location (at least, not yet), but I’ll just say that it was a concert. It was a concert, and, not just of one artist, but multiple. It was something we had also went to the previous year, which was our first time going, but this time was so much more awesome. To keep it short, I was probably one of the luckiest people there that night. Not only was I technically 2nd in line to meet the lead singer of one of my all-time favorite bands (and get his autograph), I was also able to meet all the members of another band that I hadn’t discovered until I heard them there, and have them all sign their latest CD. Oh, and I got a picture with them, too. So, with all that happening, and just being there with my awesome friends, definitely made it the greatest night of my life. We didn’t get back until late at night, but I had plenty of souvenirs that I brought home from it. It was AWESOME. Then, after that, nothing happened Sunday, and my life didn’t start picking up again until I finally got back to school this past Monday.

Nothing really happened during the school day, so I’ll skip to archery practice. Well, except I got to show my archery buddy’s cousin my new phone, and she stopped hounding me, so that was my major accomplishment of the day. So, I thought we were going to have softball not long after like usual, but our coach sent out a text saying we were changing to Tuesday’s, Wednesday’s & Thursday’s, and that we weren’t doing normal practice, but workouts, like weightlifting, and such. Although, I actually ended up not going all week. Anyways, back to archery. Monday was a pretty good shooting day for me. I’m finally starting get a grip on what I need to do to be able to shoot where I want, and it’s great! Although, I do still have problems with certain arrows. Like one time, when I was shooting from the 15 meter line, 15 meters, I had the most awesome group going I’d had all season, but then, on the last arrow, it totally sucked. I was so mad! It’s like, that one arrow that just hates you. Ha. But seriously, though. It was bitter-sweet. After practice was over, I walked out with my archery buddy, and, guess what? You remember the thing I told you about happening the Thursday before Break? I finally told her about it. She felt bad afterwards, and I was left wondering why I even worried in the first place. My archery buddy, and our other friend in that class, they’re both nice people, but, sometimes, I think they have a little trouble showing it. She even told our other friend about, and she said the same thing. She said that I could just come up and sit with them whenever, which, I did already know that, but there were certain things I wanted to make sense of. Now, everything is just fine. And, you know what? Tuesday, our other friend wasn’t even there, nor was the 4th member of our usual party, so we just stayed in our seats beside each other and worked on some stuff we had to do. The day after that, my archery buddy told me that she would just ask me from now on if she could go up there, because she also said that, if I was ever feeling down, or needed a buddy, or something like that, she would just stay back there with me. See? She really is a good person.

So, Wednesday, I had gotten myself all ready because I thought I was going to go to softball that day, but, I ended up just going to archery with my archery buddy’s cousin, who I ended up waiting at her house with again. Let me just say, though, that staying for archery was a last minute decision. We were just getting ready to stop at the gym to let my archery buddy’s cousin off, then I decided that, instead of softball, I would do archery instead. Thus, I haven’t done softball all week long. That’s okay, though, because I can always go next week. Well, hopefully. But, anyway, I’m actually really glad I chose archery instead, because it ended up being the best night practice ever, despite the fact my score dropped a little (my score is never that good on Wednesday’s anyway). The reason for that is because, not only did we finally get our new team shirts (which are totally awesome), but, after practice, when everyone else was gone except for me and one best freshman friend (and our coach), we just sat there and totally rocked out to different songs by bands we both liked a lot, and it was awesome! One of the best parts was our coaches’ reactions to me singing along with one song, and both of us dancing to another. Yep. Best night practice ever.

The next day, Thursday, yesterday, I didn’t even go to school. Why? Because, where I am, it got colder than Antarctica, with a negative degree wind chill! So, my dad decided I would just stay home. Luckily, though, I didn’t miss much, as I found out when I came back today. Today, though, was the first day of final exams, before we move on to the 2nd Term, where everyone’s class schedule gets changed. But, the good news is, I only had one final today, and, when I thought I might actually fail it (it’s my 4th period, which I’m passing with flying colors), I did manage to pass, with a really decent grade. So, that was the only thing I really had to worry about, if only a little. For my 5th period, which is my hardest class (that I’m failing), we never even went into the classroom. Our teacher’s 4th period class is even harder than ours, so there were still people n there from that class who were finishing up that final. So, we had to spend the whole time hanging out in the classroom next to it, which was okay with me, because we got to just do whatever we wanted to do. So, I chatted with my friends for awhile, then I sat down on the ground and listened to music on my phone. It was pretty great. For 6th period, which is when we should’ve had another final, I just had a really long study hall, which I spent the whole time typing this post, actually. 7th period, we just worked on studying on our final for that class, which isn’t until Tuesday. Now I’ll be moving on to much more recent events. So, for the past little while, I’ve actually been failing my 1st period class, and so I’ve been worrying about that. So, I decided to go talk to that teacher, and now I have new hope. All I have to do is make sure I study really hard over the weekend, then, as long as I pass the final, I can pass the class. I mean, hey, I’m on the verge of passing anyway. Oh, and, one other thing. I wasn’t worried about my 5th period final at first, but then, my archery buddy, of all people, said that she believed in me. Because, our teacher just recently said that, if we get a passing grade on the final, even if we’re failing, that’ll become our grade for the class. Now, I don’t even need to pass it, because I don’t even need that class, but, all because of my archery buddy, and her cousin, too, I will try and put forth some effort, because that’s just who I am. I will hold their belief in my heart with me to the day of the final, and that will be what motivates me. I know some of you might find that strange, but it’s how I’ve been for as long as I can remember now. I’m not ashamed of who I am, not one bit.

And, for the last thing, I’m currently finishing this post up in the gym, because we’re having yet another archery match later tonight. Wish us luck! Later!

Come back for my next post!

Well everyone, a new week has begun, but I’m going to tell you about things that happened last week, certain things that changed. Beware, they might shock you, maybe even more than you think.

I’ll get straight to what happened, and then the title of this post will make way more sense. I don’t remember exactly when I finally decided it, but, Wednesday, I officially cut contact with my now-former best friend. See, that was a pretty darn big shocker, wasn’t it? Bet you didn’t think I’d drop a bomb like that, did you? Anyway, it’s true. I decided to do it because I felt it to be for the best. I mean, we don’t have any classes together, so we never really got to see each other or talk that much anyway. Also, she and I are both going through big changes, and I just thought it would be best for us to go on our own separate paths, at least for awhile. Also, even though I always said I wanted to protect her, it took me this long to realize that, she never really needed it. She never really needed me for anything, aside from the times I was there to comfort her when she was sad about something. So, Wednesday, I told her what I had decided during lunch. I told her that I think we should go our separate ways for awhile, mostly because of the changes. I told her that I didn’t want to sound mean, but I was going to quit worrying about her completely. I told her I loved her to death, but I felt it needed to be this way. So, that was the end. However, I do have complete faith that we will definitely end up crossing paths again. So, in short, I’ve disconnected myself from her world completely. I’ll admit, it was pretty hard, and I was sad for awhile, but, when I told my other friends and my family about it and why I did it, they all said I did the right thing. Also, whenever something ends, no matter how hard it may be, there will also be a new beginning. I think that that will be the beginning of new relationships in the future, with all the new people on the archery team, and all my softball teammates. So, whatever may come now, I’m ready to face it head-on. That wasn’t the only thing that changed, though. For the entirety of that week, I thought for sure that I would end up having an emotional breakdown. Why? Because of the great change that I’ve undergone.

Now, let me just say, when this happened, when I finally realized that, not only was I changing, but when I realized what kind of change it was, I felt very, very conflicted. I started feeling ways that I knew I probably shouldn’t. And I started feeling like that there was something I wanted, but it would be forever and always out of my reach. In other words, I spent the majority of the week on the brink of despair. But, for a current update, I’m glad to say that I have finally come to terms with my change, no matter what may come because of it. Oh, and that something I want? I know exactly what it is, and I know it’s wrong, but, as a human, I really can’t help how I feel about certain things, so, even though the chances of me ever obtaining it are probably slim-to-none, I’ll still hope for it, but only a little, because there is such a thing as too much hope, and that can make things go in the opposite direction you want them to. So, for now, I’ve just gone back to being how I normally am, how my family and friends are used to me being, happy, upbeat and a little crazy at times. What does the future hold? Only time will tell. So, for now, I’ll just set back, relax, and watch my life play out before me. The future isn’t set in stone, it can always be changed, depending on what directions we take, and the decisions we make. I’m gonna see just how far I can get. That’s all for now.

Come back for my next post!

Hey everyone, sorry for the slightly long absence. Things around me have been changing so fast, I haven’t been able to post until now. Last week I went to another game (refer to my last post). I’ll admit, the first time I went was just a little more fun, but I still had a good time. Also, during the time between the first game I went to and the second game I went to (two consecutive weeks), I felt the most conflicted I’d felt this whole school year so far. I wouldn’t have felt like that had my archery buddy not suggested that I do something else, an actual sport, along with archery, for my last year. That sport is… softball. It’s not that different from baseball, and the only thing I might possibly have any problem with is the underhanded pitching. I’ll tell you, it would be pretty awesome. I played Little League back elem. school, and I’d be lying if I said the thought of doing one more actual sport before I graduate hadn’t crossed my mind. So, of course I felt conflicted. I knew it would interfere with archery to a degree, because my archery buddy started playing last year as a junior. She missed some practices here and there, and I thought I would have to choose between the two, which would have been very difficult. I mean, this year will be my third year on the archery team. Why be on the team and enjoy it so much for two years then decide to do something completely different? Then, however, I found out that I actually wouldn’t have to choose, though, that I would just have to find a way to divide my time between both activities evenly. So, you guessed it, I’m gonna do it! I’m going to be a student athlete for my final year! Or, at least, I’m going to attempt to be one. There is a class that I’ll have to get my grade up in if I want to be able to do that, though. I’m working as hard as I can in there, but, whether I want to or not, I’m probably going to end up having to switch out of it next term. It is without a doubt the hardest class I’ve ever had, ever. Well, we’ll see what happens. Anyways, isn’t that exciting? I even went and got the opinions of a lot of my friends, including a couple who are in archery with me, and, I kid you not, every single one of them said they think I should do it. One of them even said, “We don’t want to hog all your awesomeness (for archery). I think you’d be good at it.” That, I think, is the main statement that helped me make my final decision.

In other news, I’m not the only one experiencing change. Big changes are also happening with my best friend. She said they were good at first, so I was happy because she looked happier than she had for awhile. Although, something completely unexpected did happen. I mean, there is really no way I could’ve seen it coming. My best friend and her boyfriend broke up. In all truthfulness, she was actually the one that broke off with him. I thought she was going to be sad, but it was after that happened that she told me things were changing for her, in a good way. After that, I thought she would be single for awhile, because I honestly didn’t know who else she could go with. However, only two days afterward, she was already with someone else. The guy is someone she met in one of her classes, and, I had talked to him a little bit, but I never, ever expected them to get together. When I found out, of course, my protective wolf instincts took over. Since it’s someone new, who I’m not used to, I guess I lost all control of myself and told him this exactly: “Well, that was fast. I think I’ll watch over you guys for a bit. (Looks at him intensely) Just so you know, I’m her best friend, so you’re gonna have to earn my trust, too. I’ll be watching you like a hawk. Understand?” Yeah, I got a little protective, but that’s only normal, right? Anyways, I just found out today that something is still going on with my best friend and her ex. I actually talked to him today (I got used to him, so, even though they’re broken up, I still see him as a friend), asked him what was going on with them. He looked at me and said, “I think she’ll want to tell you that herself.” So, I said alright and walked away. I still don’t know what’s going on, but I’m hoping I’ll get the chance to talk to her after school today. Maybe I’ll be able to figure just exactly what is going on.

And finally, just so you all know, this will most likely be my last post until the week after next, because next week is Fall Break for my school, and you know I don’t usually post outside of school. Although, I have done it at least a couple times before. Well, who knows? Later. Come back for my next post!